Back in July, I caught myself fantasizing about my life in the year 2030, when my youngest graduates from high school.
Longing for a better life in the future is a sure sign that I need to make changes in the present!
My dream, of 2030, was an example of the main excuses that I give myself:
- Money – If only I had more…
- Marriage – I can’t do that, I’ll damage my…
- Kids – The trap of giving to the point of self-neglect and external resentment…
To the list above, I’ll add “Family” – I hear others say that they can’t do XYZ because of family considerations.
While it helps our own happiness to serve another, resentment happens when we feel bound to serve.
I know from my own experience that a resentful grandson, son, father or husband isn’t much help at all. I’m awful to live with when filled with resentment.
My antidote with relationships is straightforward.
- Empower each other to say “no”
- Always be part of the solution – much better than seeking to be THE solution!
- Respect other people and let them solve their own situations
- Consider every interaction a gift, rather than an obligation – point #1 is essential for this mindset
Now, with money, the antidote is more complicated. My best advice: start by ditching people, situations and things that makes you feel envy.
Envy distracts me from my true needs.
Recently, I spent six years working myself out of financial squeeze and wanted to share the process. When I’m not sure what to do, I start with a clean sheet of paper.
Blank Sheet Living…
Based on where I am today, where would I like to be in five years and what’s it going to take to get there?
Six years ago, I decided that it was important to reduce my family’s net cost of living. I looked at moving to where I could earn more money (Silicon Valley) and where I could live far more cheaply (Boulder County).
In the end, the US Federal Reserve drove mortgage rates to the point where I moved across town, downsized 50% and achieved my goal.
It took a surprisingly large amount of effort to take the path of least resistance!
So now I’m “there” – I achieved my plan and have the ability to reset my life again.
Additionally, I have a wonderful spouse that empowers me to do ANYTHING.
There is deep wisdom in empowering another to choose to love, and serve, us.
I’ve lost all my excuses.
It can be terrifying to lose my excuses!
Goal: Strategy, Tactics
Serenity: Time Alone, Weekly overnights to the high country to explore in solitude
Connection: More Monsy, Share experiences with my spouse and strengthen my marriage, which is my best asset
Long-term Health: Use My Drive For Fitness, Exercise twice a day, watch the booze and carbs
Serenity, Connection and Long-term Health => What’s Your List?