Tag Archives: life coaching

Creating a Self-Directed Life With Meaning

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Let’s dig a little deeper into a topic I discussed with Rich.

The year is 2000, I’m divorcing and have the urge to leave everything (job, city, hemisphere).

This is a common feeling.

The idea that everything would be better if I could just start fresh.

The one piece of advice I listened to….

Slow Down

Before taking action, I started journalling.

My program was from The Artist’s Way and boils down to this…

Write three pages every morning for 12 weeks and pay attention to what you’re telling yourself

These days, there is a video course.

My journalling resulted in my first Top Ten List, below, from 2000.

There wasn’t much overlap between where I was and where I wanted to be.

The desire to leave, seemed legit.

So I left.

How did it go?

  1. Writing you
  2. In an organized office
  3. Feeling relaxed
  4. With an 8:29 IM best
  5. In a home base
  6. Having published 1,000+ articles
  7. Still have too much stuff
  8. With an absolutely wonderful wife
  9. Could do with being less serious
  10. Once again, looking for new challenges

It is NOT as simple as writing a list and sitting back.

We gotta make it happen.

To make improvement happen, we need to know where we want to go.

…and writing is one way to get out of our own way

…out of all the external wants of our environment

Working in finance, living in Hong Kong, caught in a life driven by acquisition/spending…

My thoughts were dominated by external wants.

I went to Far North Queensland and the South Island of New Zealand.

Cleared my head out and built the life I wanted to lead.

These days the process is much simpler.

Five Minutes AM & PM

I use a few short prompts I got from Dickie Bush

Same idea: get out of my own way and see what I’m telling myself.

What do I have to say?

2022 rhymes with 2000

  • Less is OK
  • Grateful for my adult setbacks and childhood difficulties
  • Moderate the peaks
  • Simple questions work
  • Winning doesn’t feel different
  • Less stuff makes me feel serene
  • I’m preparing for a very slow race
  • Get fit, not stuff
  • My kids are leaving soon – enjoy them
  • Tired means I’ve done enough
  • Focus on the week, not the outcome
  • It’s OK to leave it alone
  • Don’t buy anything I have to manage
  • Everything is trending up

Do you notice the difference between the two lists?

First off, the list feels more positive. I start every morning by writing down something I’m grateful for.

When I started, gratitude seemed hokey.

23 years ago, I felt the same way about love.

It’s a lot easier to fill a need if we’re open to the concept.

I want to repeat, it’s important…

Love. Respect. Admiration. Connection.

You don’t have to admit it to anyone other than yourself.

Be open to realizing what’s lacking in your life.

—

Next, my list makes it obvious that my life situation is not a problem.

Whatever I need to do… I can do right here.

This gets to The Question I talked about with Rich.

If this was it, are you OK with it?

You Gotta Make It Happen

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More Resources

My thread on the book, Time Management for Mortals – how to do

Five Questions to Ask Yourself & Becoming Lifestyle Sustainable

The biggest mistake I saw in Finance – a life of experiences, not stuff

The Choices That Define Your (Financial) Life

A similar article to today, from 2004.

LINK to web archive of above

A similar article to today, from 2011

Link to Top Ten List from my early 40s – from when I decided to phase out racing

Posted in our kitchen

Four Questions to Help Self-Coached Athletes Achieve Their Best Season Ever

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Running to a podium finish at Ironman New Zealand

Each week I post my Training Review on Twitter.

My review is driven by four questions:

  1. What went right?
  2. Did I hit my minimums?
  3. Where can I trade stress?
  4. What can screw things up?

My questions track to actions:

  1. Keep
  2. Add
  3. Trade
  4. Remove and Address

Across the week, I take notes and when I take my back-to-back recovery days, I review the week.

++

What Went Right?

You are going to be tempted to “progress the week.”

Unfortunately, in highly motivated populations, this leads to breakdown, and missed gains!

Better to repeat the week & keep what works

++

Did I Hit My Minimums?

Last Thursday, I gave you a Training Intensity Allocation.

Let’s see what that implies for my last week: 15 hours total => 900 minutes

  1. Strength => 90 minutes
  2. Stamina => 720 minutes
  3. Intensity => 90 minutes
    1. Tempo => 54 Minutes
    2. Threshold => 27 minutes
    3. VO2 & VO2+ => 9 minutes

Is there a training segment that I’m avoiding?

Think outside the box, there are many interesting sessions that are hybrids of strength/intensity.

Use the small allocations wisely and have fun with them.

++

What Trades Make Sense?

First Two Tips:

  1. Repeat don’t progress
  2. Hit the minimums

If I want to ADD then do a TRADE.

Example #1: I like to run in the hills. However, I don’t need to run up a mountain every week! Across a week, a fortnight, a month… I manage my “elevation load” between weeks.

Example #2: I’m relatively strong for my age and category. I trade Strength load to accommodate more Stamina within my week.

Example #3: Max HR test last week? Add more Zone 1 to start the following week. Balance the intensity mixes across more than just the week. Give yourself time to fully absorb your highest intensity sessions. Same thing applies for sessions that cause significant muscle damage (plyometrics, downhill run load).

Example #4: get to the source of your life stress:

  • Sleep
  • Alcohol
  • Energy deficits
  • Spontaneous tempo
  • Over-reaction
  • Excessive load
  • Too many goals

If I want to better absorb training then reduce the stress caused by choices outside my core goals.

Endurance training, done to the best of our ability, offers an incentive to straighten out our lives.

++

Avoiding Ruin – What Might Screw Up Next Week?

In the acute sense… Avoid The Injury!

Take time to address the little niggles while they are still little!

Dial the program DOWN before the injury is created.

Trade low quality days for high quality weeks.

In the chronic sense… going down an unsustainable path feels great, ride up to the day before you fall apart!

Consider, then address, areas of instability:

  • Relationships
  • Sponsors
  • Finances
  • Emotions
  • Habits

How to make this happen?

Put it in your calendar!

Make an appointment with yourself, daily.

Example: 10 minutes every day on mobility and one positive action to reduce long term stress.

Little positive steps have big impacts when applied over long time horizons.

The ability to bring these habits into your athletic life gives you a skill set to improve all aspects of your life.

Coaching Elite Performers

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Rolling strong at the swim meet

A coach is someone who can offer correction without causing resentment

– John wooden

When I notice someone has been triggered, I stop.

My life goals do not require me to change other people.

Inverting, being prickly reduces the world’s ability to help us out.

If you struggle to learn from experience then ASK…

  • What is it going to take for me to trust the process?
  • What is it going to take for me to trust the coach?

For me, It was watching Nils & Johan take everything I learned about sport and make it better. I wanted to take my knowledge to the next level.

In February, one small choice by Johan, set off of positive chain that brought us together.

What’s it going to take for you?

If you have no idea then that’s OK!

Think back, who gets through to me, without resentment?

Combine with goals & VALUES alignment, and you have the ingredients for a valuable long-term relationship.

  • My marriage
  • My investment committee
  • My close friends
  • My board

All contain people who are able to get through to me. I am surrounded by elite coaches.

In our lives, we will come across people who have the capacity to make us want to improve, and the vision to make incremental suggestions that we can implement.

Pay attention when you feel their positive influence.

Johan’s 2022 Scorecard

Each adjustment, I had been unable to implement previously.

Inside, I feel like I volunteered for all of them.

And I did.

But someone was the catalyst.

Share your story => someone needs to hear it.